Run

I'm frozen in place when my fears take the best of me. I am a person that no matter the circumstances or ordeals...I suck it up! I pick myself up no matter the degree of unberable pain, I always pick myself up and keep living my life. Lately, after experincing happiness with a new person, those doubts and fear I have been sucking up don't leave me be to have peace of mind, soul and especially, my heart. Sleep don't come easy and neither does concentration with all the goals I want to accomplish but when it comes to matters of the heart, I am very selfless. My world feels upside down and its hard to make sense of everything. How can you mesh the good times wih the hard times??? When things don't start making sense and are getting confusing, what is there to do??? There are moments were I feel like I'm holding my breath and everything just freezes. What do I wanna do? Disappear. I want to go far were no one knows me and all those that did, won't hear from me again. Run would be the best option when you feel you can keep yourself in one piece. Fragile, that should be a sign in my forehead but I am to prideful for that. I don't tend to talk about my feelings, my faults and feel vulnerable. What I do is be there and try to be what the other person wants. If someone knows what it is to live a double life, I do! Trying to please everybody else and you always end up loosing. What do you loose? If you catch me, maybe I will tell you!